A guy called Larry Busby from one of the redneck hubs of the world Austin Texas is a wedding photographer and he’s willing to pay someone – anyone – $1500 to introduce him to the woman of his dreams, and an extra $1000 if it leads to marriage.
Photographing all those weddings sure must have made Larry a lonely boy because this is pretty desperate behaviour. You might think that this would be easy money and that you might want to take Larry up on the offer – I mean there must be some girl out there you could split the money with, right? – but when you check out Larry’s website Sleepless In Austin (I see what you did there Larry, smart), which incidentally looks like it was made on Geocities in 1997 – then you’ll realise that the guy is actually batshit insane and there isn’t any chance he’s ever going to get a girlfriend, even if he offered ten times the finder’s fee.
Firstly, even though his name is Larry Busby, Larry prefers to go by his stage name Romeo Rose. I’m not sure when he plays music but his music video below somehow has 300K views on YouTube. This is clearly because it’s completely terrible and weird though and is basically just him playing blues and repeating lines over and over again that don’t make any sense.
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Ok so you can see the kind of guy we’re dealing with here right? You haven’t seen anything yet though when you sift through all the crap on his website about what he does and who he wants and why he wants it. Over the following pages I’m gonna discuss some of my favourite points in his online dossier of the requirements of the perfect woman, but as extensive as this is I seriously could not do them all because there are so goddamn many. So if you’re still intrigued after reading this then make sure you head on over to Sleepless In Austin and check it out.
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